Diary Day
April 4, 2022
1135
Today was a scattered blur of disparate scenes. It began, as usual, taking the kiddo to school, checking email, and taking the puppy for a walk. Next, I went to an unplanned dentist appointment to fix a chipped front tooth that just chipped last night. I’m impressed with how quickly and well they were able to see me and fix the tooth.
After that, I spent hours with a new neighbor family, a family from Afghanistan who arrived in Muncie two weeks ago after having lived in a Texas hotel for months. I am their “welcome family,” a position I have wanted to do for months but didn’t feel that I could give it adequate time. I still don’t but accepted the responsibility anyway. The father is my age and had a sixth-grade level education in Afghanistan. He reads and writes at an elementary level in Pashto and speaks little English. The mother has never been formally educated and speaks no English, and as far as I can tell, she has a great sense of humor. She is in her early 40s. They have three boys ages 14, 12, and 8. The eldest speaks the most English but not a lot. The boys are all eager to learn English and I’m sure that they will learn quickly. For their sake, hopefully the parents will learn quickly, too. They are both taking adult English classes, which is a great start. Last week, I helped to enroll the boys in school, changed the family’s mailing address to Muncie at the post office, took them shopping at Walmart, and helped them to open a bank account. Mr. C. already has an interview for a job that pays $15+/hour. The boys have started school. I’m not sure if B.’s health will allow her to work right away, or if she even wants to get a paid job. The C.’s live in an apartment block not that far from me where at least 4 other Afghan families live, which gives them a chance to socialize and build community with people who speak the same language as they do, not that language alone makes community.
Today, we returned to the bank and filled a prescription. Because we need Google Translate to communicate, any given task takes considerably longer than it would if we all spoke the same language. It also makes things more interesting. The bank appointment took longer than I would have liked. When Mr. C.’s watch alarm rang, I suspected it was for prayer. It’s Ramadan and the family is fasting and praying. I rushed to get them home to pray. On the way home, through miming, the woman asked how many children I have (they have already met my kid.) and I held up my finger for “one.” She smiled and mimed “prayer” and held up two fingers. I understood that to mean that she would pray for at least one more child for me, because everyone should have at least two children. We all laughed. I have missed moments like this. They make me feel more human, make my life feel bigger and more expansive. We come from different backgrounds, different climates, and cultures, but we can still connect at some level. It’s good to step outside of the rut and communicate in new ways, to learn from people who have lived differently than I have, who think differently than I do, and to try to collaborate and learn from one another.
Muncie is better for the arrival of our new neighbors and surely our city is better for them than the purgatory of a Texas hotel. We now have almost 100 individuals from Afghanistan. I hope that Muncie will be able to attract and retain more new American neighbors in the future. This is something that I’m actively working to make happen.
I went home after the excursion with new neighbors to eat lunch, walked the dog to campus to meet with a student over Zoom, grabbed a pile of books, headed to school to pick up A. and walked home before a meeting. Other than this 4:00 meeting, none of these appointments had been planned today. On my “to do” list had been grading and prepping for class. What happened? I took students to a conference in Chicago last weekend and I’m making up for lost time. I had never been to this conference before and had never planned to go because it is not my area of interest or expertise, but students wanted to go, so I took them, and it was fun. The first and last time I took students to a conference was five years ago. I haven’t attended an in-person conference since November 2019. The students learned so much by participating and seeing how academia works not to mention traveling with friends/ colleagues and a professor to a new city. I proudly watched the students participate on Thursday and then together we watched a few more panels, and then I took the four of them out for Chicago deep-dish pizza. I didn’t even look at the program for other panels or papers to see the rest of the time I was in the city. I worked in my hotel room on Friday morning, took a former Ball State Master’s student out for lunch, and then worked some more, this time in a coffee shop with adequate views of downtown Chicago urban life. I haven’t worked in a coffee shop since pre-COVID either. It felt like a dream, not an exciting “living the dream,” but a dream where you wonder if you’re dreaming or awake.
I planned to stay an extra day in Chicago to catch up with old friends from my undergrad years, but they were not available until Saturday so on Friday, I prepared to leave downtown and head to their part of the city to treat myself to the kind of dinner one can’t buy in Muncie. As I prepared to leave the conference, I ran into a good friend and former colleague who I didn’t know was at the conference. Like me, he was an interloper. We went out for a drink and discovered that his sister and my friends lived within a mile of one another just outside of the city, so we went to his sister’s place for dinner where we ate take-out tacos and drank mescal and laughed as we played with their shepherd-mix dog. It was a far better evening than eating alone, not that I mind being alone. I enjoyed the 4-hour drive to and from Chicago, listening to music, calling family members, and just being alone. But also, it has been a long time since I felt the “high” that comes with spontaneous socializing and meeting new people. The conference was more scripted and running into N was a great break from the script.
On Saturday, I met up with K and L. We’ve been friends for more than 25 years. I attended their wedding after our sophomore year of college before any of us were 21. Back then, they swore they would never have children. They have two boys now, ages 8 and 12. Each time I see them I am reminded of the people we were, the dreams we had, and how those plans played out as we became the people we are now. It’s a different kind of high than meeting new people, more scripted but also deeply therapeutic.
For all this, I am grateful to my students for convincing me to go to a conference I otherwise would not have attended.
House Showing 2022
L = Leave M = Move P = Paint S = Sell W = Wallpaper ? = Undecided
Status
P’s Office: L Bookcases(7)-attached
Gold Chair
Basket Coffee Table
CD’s & DVD’s & Books
Closet thinned, keep Safe
Wallpaper?
Stuff on floor
Refrigerator
Desk & Chair
Pix drum
Boxes & cartons of papers
Closet Bookshelves
Quilt rack
J’s Office: Table out
Closet thinned
Shelf unit out
Floor items out
Move couch (HAB hide-a-bed broken) & coffee table
Cabinet
Fabric cartons
Sewing machine, Equipment & Supplies
Master Bedroom: Bed
Clear under bed
Black Recliner
Nightstands(2)
Dressers(2)
Closet thinned
Closet shelf unit
Guest Room: Closet thinned
Remove TV
Clear under bed
Wallpaper & curtains?
Dresser
Master Bath: Wallpaper?
Cabinet thinned
P’s Bath: Cabinet thinned
Wooden stool removed
Wallpaper?
Living Room: TV Cabinet .Top section
TV Cabinet . Bottom section
Couches (3) remain or removed HAB(1)
Light tables
Light tree
Foot stool
Camel saddle
Family Room: Recliner
Rocking chair
Quilt chest coffee table
Bookcase
TV
Desk & chair
File drawer cabinet
Light table
Under couch cleared-HAB
Dining Room: Wallpaper?
Box stack
Table w/o extensions(2)
Chairs(4)
Sunroom: Art cabinet?
Some exercise eqp.-Erg & Bike
Equipment cabinet
TV not attached
Bracket attached
Pt. wall white
Pt. floor gray
Couch
Coffee tables(2)
Faux tree plant
Clear floor
Kitchen: Stool
Table & 6 chairs
Counter top?
Furnace Room: Clean out more
Dining room table extensions
Vaccum
Mops
Carpet shampooer
Laundry Shelf: Clean off shelf more
Curtain half down
Washer & Dryer (stackable)
Front Closet: Thinned out
Shoe rack
Linen Closet: Straightened
Remove cleaners
Garage: Wood out
Remove shelves & Unused items & Racks
Remove fridge
Remove TV = attached
Cabinets, Bookcase & Hutch & Dressers & Desk
Storage organized
Remove cleaners
Tools – Electric or Battery
Ceiling hooks
Deck: Paint x 2 or 3
Lights on
Cabinet thinned out or removed
Furniture
Attic: Remove boxes
Remove suit cases
Remove Christmas
Remove / sort photos
Remove Games
Remove empty containers & cardboard boxes
Remove memories
Remove out-of-season clothes
Folding tables(2) & Camp chairs(4)
Barn: Boxes / cartons on shelves
Loose items on shelves
Mower
Wagon
Wood
Tools on wall & Items on floor
Ladders
Remove interior motion lights
Remove exterior motion lights
Hooks on ceiling
Kayaks & Paddles(2)
Yard: Remove cabin & rocks by Barn
Move furniture from deck
Paint deck(2 or 3)
Remove exterior motion lights
Pick up leaves
Pick up nuts & Nuts
Rake bare spots, Plant grass seed & Cover with topsoil
Move furniture from front porch
Park Bench
Hoses (3) & Sprinklers
Flag
Bottles thinned out: Garage
Barn shelves
Furnace room
Laundry room
Pantry
Under bathroom sinks (3)
Under kitchen sink
Linen closet
Contacts: Garage sale?
Carpet upstairs?
Carpet all cleaned
Painter – touch up & wallpaper?
Painter-inside pantry
Painter-near LR TV
Painter- steps & handrails
Secure handrail
Counter top?
Plumber – faucets & master stool
Bigger Projects: Carpet clean
Dig up weeds
Lawn Seed & Straw
Plant flowers
Mulch flower beds
Locksmith-change all locks at new house
Clean tile graut
Driveway & sidewalk
Wallpaper
Paint & touch-up
Motion lights – all entrances
Wash windows
Painting spots on kitchen ceiling
Pressure wash garage floor & Deck
Last Minute Organizing: Dust
Charging cables
Pick up pee pads
Water indoor plants
Tighten all knobs
Who to notify: Bank
IRS
Indiana State Treasury
Indiana DMV Drivers License & Car Title
Utility Companies
Insurance providers
Estate Contacts
Attorney
Life Insurance Companies
Automatic Deposit Companies
Automatic Payment Companies
Credit Card Companies
Pension Deposits
Return Address Labels
Church Directory
Friends & Family