Day Diary – Sunday, February 4, 2018
6:30-7:45
Woke up about 6:30, and for reasons unknown I was dreaming a student in one of my classes was pregnant. Curiously, she sits a few seats away from a student who is pregnant.
The UU church song “Go Now In Peace” is stuck on autoplay in my head. I’m probably processing my complicated yet simple dislike of that experience, working through why, if I like the people and the values expressed there, why the services leave me cold. I’m just not a joiner and never have been. That’s probably a demerit against my character.
Took the dog out in a slow snow storm with large flakes. Everything still and quiet.
Read The New York Times online. More depressing news about the undermining of our national institutions. And I read about the reopening of the Natalie Wood drowning case. Not sure why that got my attention.
My girls are up. Before ‘hello’ or ‘good morning, daddy’ I got a complaint about broken headphones and a comment on whether their mother ate three cookies. She did not. I’m responsible for that last missing one. I am not responsible for the headphones breaking.
Wrote these notes.
7:45-8:25
Fed the dog. Reviewed Othello for class tomorrow. Made a fruit smoothie for breakfast.
8:25-9:15 – showered and dressed, started laundry, wrote a colleague about our team-taught class tomorrow.
9:15- 11:00
Made a cup of tea. Emptied the dishwasher while it steeped. An achievable task in brewing time. Christopher Walken was on the boat the night Natalie Wood died. I saw him as Iago in Othello in Shakespeare in the Park in 1991. Played him as a Brooklyn street tough all in leather. It’s all coming together today.
Listening to clarinet and violin practice simultaneously. Lucky man. If you haven’t heard “Yellow Submarine” on clarinet you haven’t lived. Now it’s “Rudolf the Red-Nosed Reindeer.” What kind of crazy clarinet jukebox is this? Wait, here comes “The Candy Man”. Blends well with the Bach coming down from upstairs in spurts. Had a discussion about why she might want to practice more than 15 minutes, and that maybe repeating the same song would help her learn to play it better. Got nowhere.
I’m told I don’t need to go to church. Her commitment is not your commitment. If it were only that easy.
Finished reviewing Colson Whitehead’s The Colossus of New York for class tomorrow. They like it. New data for what Middletown read right here.
11:00 – off to the UU church of Muncie. Felt the usual helpless despair. Today, listening to voices from African-American UU members on their views of being left out. I don’t doubt for a second that’s an issue, but what to do about it? The white UU minister read their words to the all-white congregation. I wondered why the church moved out to the woods on the outskirts of town from downtown decades ago and whether race had anything to do with it. I left with no clear sense of what to do about this huge problem. The money they’re raising goes to what, exactly? Nice sentiments, like the one’s you’d find in a Hallmark card.
Tried to take the girls to a new restaurant for lunch. Their fear of the new sunk that plan. Home we went.
Discussed meals for the week. Helped prepare a shopping list.
1:30 – lunch at home
2:00 – back to Othello and some grading of student papers.
3:00-4:00 – a trip to Payless for some essential hunting and gathering. Not my favorite activity, but then eating is good.
Came home to some more laundry, folding and putting away.
Fighting the blues today. Don’t know if it was the sense of futility after the UU church service, or lingering resentments. Maybe just that every weekend is the same and I have that “how did I get to this point” feeling, then feeling guilty that I feel that way because my life is so good and comfortable – loving family, steady job I like, etc.
4:00-5:00
Painted a birthday card for my mother who turns 75 next Friday. Hard to believe.
Spent some time thinking about maps and looked at a box of maps I have called Where You Are: A Book of Maps that will Leave you Completely Lost. One of them was only a series of paintings called “tablescapes”, which was literally just things on the artist’s desk.
Here’s what on my desk right now as I type this: laptop, lamp, drawing mannequin, portable hard drive, jar with 50 things my family loves about me in it, picture of my girls, a coaster with cameras on it, an empty glass, headphones, glasses case, cards for Mom, the girls’ thank you cards to their grandmother, an Alaska cruise book, an essay on lyric essays, various paper notes, a steno book, a poem I wrote about a Giotto painting, my Moleskine book with notes, my arms, the book I mentioned above, a birthday card, a copy of Othello and The Colossus of New York by Colson Whitehead, three folders with class materials in them, a copy of Nonstop Metropolis by Solnit and Schapiro, a ceramic bowl made by a BSU student with a few pens in it, two blue post-it notes, a pen, reading glasses, another pen.
5:00-9:00
Some guitar playing, a short nap, followed by making dinner, getting the girls to make their lunches for school. Wife away teaching yoga. More laundry. Helped younger daughter make her bed. Got the girls to set the table.
Wife home. Dinner with family. I over-cooked the veggie sausage for the pasta. Lingered over a beer for conversation with wife. Watched Super Bowl half-time show half-heartedly. Not really a fan of modern pop music. I’m too old. A question about whether Bob Dylan ever did a Super Bowl half-time show. Answer: No. Are you kidding me? Vaguely watch the game. I don’t care about either team or football, really. Another sign of un-Americanness.
Making a playlist of songs about New York City for my class.
Wife is questioning whether the electrician got the dining room dimmer switches correct. The jury’s out on that one. Stay tuned, folks.
9:00 – wife and kids have gone up for the night. Ok.
Can’t get interested in football.
Read some news.
Looked at some drawing blogs.
Took the dog out.
9:30 – wrapping up the day. Read an essay by Teju Cole about W.G. Sebald. A tender essay. Lights out. Good night.