Thursday, December 9, 2021
My day, and the entire week, begins in a haze of malaise. A both iconic and infamous word, which Jimmy Carter never actually used, yet is forever associated with a speech of his. My birthday was 8 days ago–the start of my 50th year, so I’m 2,549 weeks old plus a day, and that’s the last of the math for today.
I’m not sure the reason for the blahs… it could be the season, which has felt darker, gloomier and cast longer evening shadows than in the past. The end of Daylight Savings Time seemed to feel more drastic this year, a feeling corroborated in several friends. Maybe it’s some morbid sign that I’m dying… but, aren’t we all?
I’ve never been affected by any of the litany of seasonal disorders(tm), and I feel like I should be riding high. As touched upon in the last diary entry, my favorite team claimed a world championship, a very unexpected one. Some fans go a lifetime without, and I’ve gotten to see two inside of a generation. I’m a huge “sportsball” (as a few friends derisively call it) aficionado, and a bit of a history buff, and the Braves’ title will live on in popular lore long after my souvenir t-shirt has fallen to shreds, never to be donated.
After work, I go on an evening walk to generate thoughts and content for today’s entry. This often works well for me, and I enjoy my walks to “clear the mechanism,” as it were. I also enjoy the fresh air and exercise, and have walked all over the city and am a frequent user of our excellent greenways and walking paths. It’s carried over into other locales. Where I once sought a hotel with a pool as a kid on family trips, when I vacation now, I look for a place I can walk nearby if I’m on more than an overnight stay.
The Plague is also on my mind tonight as it approaches another year, ironically about a year after a vaccine made its debut and we were hopeful it might represent the end of this mess. Alas, now we are roughly back to where we were a year ago. Worse, family and friends have been touched over the last year, and as I write this, I have a family member hospitalized in a nearby town because our own hospital is full. Another good friend is isolating but has been ill for over a week. Concern of exposure to *something* has prompted me to seek a rapid test for the second time in three months, yet fortunately I am negative. “Just a cold,” as they say.
The thought of a worst-case scenario is depressing, yet I remain more fortunate than many.
Whatever I had is breaking up inside of me, and I’m struck with a choice of expectorating some of it into the street or into the adjacent church yard. I’m a committed agnostic, yet was raised to avoid conflict and disrespect. My annoyance with the local street department outweighs my aversion to organized religion though, and my choice is an easy one. I hock it over the curb to later freeze and biodegrade.
Overall, my twilight walk is a pleasant one, on a warmer evening than those we’ve experienced recently. After a few days of sub-freezing temperatures, the next two days are expected to push the 60’s. Another midwestern winter beckons.