Diary Day 2/13/24
Today will be an interesting day to document. As I sit down to write this morning, I imagine years down the line someone reading these to watch America’s slow decline towards fascism as observed by everyday people in Indiana. The thing on my mind today is SB 202, Indiana’s version of the trend of anti-DEI, anti-tenure bills. I’m working hard on opposing this, focusing on a Ball State Teach-In this evening where I’m speaking, but I’m also involved in letter-writing, press contact, etc. with other academics from across the state.
I first wake up at 2 am and slept poorly after that. I wanted to snuggle with my wife, but N. the cat (now 7 months old and HUGE) is between us. I actually get up at 7:15, shower, and feed the cats before driving my wife to work. She’s in office today, but I need our car. When I get back, I’m a little sad the cats don’t rush to see me; they probably thought we were gone for the day. I have to go to the doctor for some blood work later, so I doublecheck with the doctor’s office that I’m not supposed to fast. Since I’m not, I eat a bagel and have some coffee while checking my email. Most is about our SB 202 opposition. I glance at where I mapped out my work for the week and feel behind. It’s only Tuesday, I suppose, but I’m feeling overwhelmed. I map out my priorities for the day, which always helps.
First: polishing my remarks for this afternoon and following up on some group emails. I share them with the person at the state level as well. I’m annoyed that they are really focusing on the tenure aspect of this bill and not the harm that will be done to students. I’m feeling pretty good about our AAUP’s response.
Meanwhile, mundane life goes on, like playing phone tag with a doctor’s office about a bill and scooping the litter box.
News: the ACLU has come out against SB 202. That’s some good support.
At 10, I have a Zoom call with one of my best friends from grad school who I do a writing group with. I gave him some feedback on a draft he’s working on, and we spend some time talking about that as well as just catching up. Then on to a department meeting where we talk about the new core curriculum. Then we get to watch a film by a colleague who made it for her sabbatical project. It is super well-done although heart-breaking and hard-hitting for me.
Texts and emails continue on and off during this time, particularly in preparation for today and tomorrow’s events.
For lunch I need some comfort food of tomato soup and grilled cheese. Then off to get my lab work and BP check at the doctor. There are sick people there, so I’m glad I mask. Still not sure how people who see sick people all the time working at doctor’s offices don’t mask. I continue to enjoy not having been ill more than once in the last four years.
In the afternoon, I do some grading. It’s taking me longer than I realized it would. But I’m teaching more students than I have in a long time. Supposed to meet with a student on Zoom, but he’s a no show, so I take a break for some Girl Scout cookies. Then do some more grading before it’s time to leave.
I have to hand the car over to my wife, so I get back to campus early and pop in to see her at work. Then head over to the student center for our event. I’m nervous but also feeling pumped. The room is pretty empty at first but then really starts to fill with quite a few coming in later. I forgot to take the lint roller to my black sweater and tell my colleague that I have just enough cat fur to say queer liberal professor. She shows me pictures of her cats. A little everyday moment in the midst of a non-everyday day.
We get started about 5:05 and the room is pretty full by then. One of my grad students came in and sat right in the back of the room where they could look straight up the aisle at me. We did the intro, and I said my part of it. Then a colleague went over the details of the bill, and then I talked about implications, and another shared her thoughts and how to get involved. Q&A was lit. The provost gave his admin spiel, and the students came in hot. We let it get heated and a little out of control, but we wanted student voices to be heard. It was definitely the right move to bring them into this. There were at least a few community members there as well. I didn’t answer a lot of questions, but I felt like I did a good job when I did chime in. By the end of it, I’m both proud and exhausted. V. gives me a ride home and I get back about 7:20. We chat some about the event and some about just everyday things. I find I’m in a chatty mood just cause I’m so riled up and still have some nervous energy, too.
My wife is playing Baldur’s Gate with cats on her, and I tell her I’m going to warm up food and then tell her how it went over dinner. And then proceed to tell her everything about how it went first. Finally, I put some leftover steak and mashed potatoes in the oven. My wife asks if there’s anything she can do, and I ask her to make me a sandwich for work tomorrow because I’m beat. While my dinner is heating up, I take a minute to text people who were there to thank them for coming. I eat my dinner and chat more with my wife, finally asking about her day.
After dinner, I need to check in with my parents. I’ve been calling them four times a week this semester after calling them every day last semester when my Mom wasn’t doing well with her broken ankle. It’s better now, and the physical therapist made her walk for six minutes without even the walker today. She’s been feeling a little congested, though, and I hope she’s not getting sick or anything. Meanwhile, my Dad reports in about his Wii bowling practice. I like hearing about the league, but the daily practice is a bit much, especially today, and I’m not fully listening. I tell them about the event, and I think they kind of get it. My dad said he went to some interesting discussion on college campuses in the 60s. But it also feels like they kind of don’t get it. Higher ed has definitely changed since they retired, now nearly 20 years ago.
After chatting with the parents, I sit down on the couch next to my wife and work on typing this up. About 9:00 she hands the controller over to me so I can play some Baldur’s Gate. It’s our evening entertainment currently. My grad students are really into this game, and it’s been fun to relate to them by talking about it. I played the original in 1998 when I first started playing videogames and first had my own computer. Forever ago. I am enjoying the game, although it’s not going to be a favorite. I’m really bad at it. Tonight my character gets stuck on a ledge, and it takes me forever to get her back to the ground again. Then I finally find a quest that I’ve been looking for and completely missed the first time around this map. I like the story and characters but I’m so bad at navigating the map that it definitely hinders my experience.
I play for about an hour and a half and am getting so sleepy that I save it just as I enter combat, which I didn’t even realize you could do. Most games don’t let you save in combat. I go get ready for bed and accidently take my morning pills for Wednesday instead of the Tuesday night ones, hopefully that won’t mess me up too much. I head to bed where I read for about 15 minutes before I get really sleepy. Usually, I fall asleep reading. But after putting the book down, my mind spins for a bit, still on the day and everything happening.